Will You Be Our Butler, Sujan?

Earlier today, our friend Sujan suggested that we could not claim to have bested the Caped Crusader until we had "a damn butler" and a "pimped lexus." We think that our decision to roost in Gotham rather than Wayne Manor gives us the edge; however, we would rather our triumph be decisive. Therefore, we invite you, Sujan

(Sujan)

to be our butler. We shall pay you in alcohol--and we know how much that means to you.

Think of all of the greats who have battled Batman, have been oh-so-close to defeating him, but have failed. Greats like

The Joker


The Penguin


Catwoman

Please, Sujan, make it happen--for them, for ourself, for yourself. We think you will be an excellent butler. Your first assignment is to procure, by whatever means necessary, a pimped Lexus.

And those of you readers who believe in the democratic power of the Internet, please take the comments section below as a surrogate petition. Let Sujan know that you, too, would like to see him be our butler.

Finally, it should be noted that, upon the release of the 1987 Batman movie, seven-year-old Handsome Brother Dean wore his Batman t-shirt for eight consecutive days.