A Passing, a Failure, and a Poem for the Weary
Blue skies forever is sad to report the passing of our comrade, "do you know how it is being on law review? because i do." In those fine pages, Jared, writing under the pseudonym, Robert S_____, produced such gems as "it's con law time and i'm PUMPED!" and "i am the team captain of team terrible." His warmth and wit will be missed.
We tip our drinks to your memory, "law review"
Of course, that fine blog's passing serves also as an opportunity for us to forget our ignominious failure to achieve admittance to even the lowliest of the law journals. How could we, founder of blue skies forever, have foundered so?
There are many theories. While we believe our rejection was likely due to an unfinished sentence in a footnote, our lovely girlfriend thinks we were damned from the opening paragraph of our submission to the journal competition:
Who was that masked man, anyway? On television, he was a crime-fighting hero of the Wild West, firing silver bullets and riding with his friend Tonto to the tune of the William Tell Overture. In Springfield, if the Stonecutters had had their druthers, he would have been a convicted child molester, protesting the next potential iteration of hysteria-inducing community notification laws. The Stonecutters, however, did not have their druthers...
Was it the two uses of druthers? Was it the Lone Ranger? We are left with nothing but questions. And when we have nothing but questions, when we are despondent and forlorn, when it seems as though the entire world is conspiring against us, we turn to the man with the answers.
Ladies and Gentleman, your favorite and ours, Science Man!
[applause]
On the Eve of the Summer of Our Discontent, We See Shades of Autumn
By Science Man
Ice is cold, while heat is hot.
Some will win, while some will not.
Despondent, double-crossed, and reeling,
Beleaguered by not-so-fresh feeling.
Take a walk along the beach;
Lost not--"Once more into the breach"
Bag in hand, follow direction:
Stench, here comes thy insurrection!
4 Comments:
uhhhh huh huh... druthers... huh huh
it's such a great word
Woe! Alas! And weep to mention,
Stench here by thy resurrection!
For breeches into which commingle
Vinegar and water, subtle tingle!,
Regain their fetid fragrance fast,
And store-bought cures ne’er stay nor last
Beyond a date, a night at most,
Amidst envir’ns so close and moist!
So buy and buy this summer’s eve,
O plastic nozzle, o fleshy sleeve!,
What temporary stays you may
To prolong the coming of the day
When returns that stench we’ve known so well,
Woeful, wet, and piscine smell!
i had a typo and edit to make, but i couldn't figure out how to fix it properly... here it is again, for the edification and amusement of the people:
Woe! Alas! And weep to mention,
Stench here be thy resurrection!
For breeches into which commingle
Vinegar and water, subtle tingle!,
Regain their fetid fragrance fast,
And store-bought cures ne’er stay nor last
Beyond a date, a night at most,
Amidst envir’ns so moist and close!
So buy and buy this summer’s eve,
O plastic nozzle, o fleshy sleeve!,
What temporary stays you may
To prolong the coming of the day
When returns that stench we’ve known so well,
Woeful, wet, and piscine smell!
Post a Comment
<< Home